Orwellian quote of the day

"You can always turn the television off and ... block the channels you don't want. But why should you have to?"
- Federal Communications Commission Chairman Kevin J. Martin, testifying at Open Forum on Decency, held by Senate Commerce Committee Chairman Ted Stevens (R-Alaska).

Before being appointed to a seat on the FCC in 2001, Martin paid his dues as Deputy General Counsel of the 2000 Bush campaign, then served on the Bush-Cheney Transition Team.

Senator Stevens is the longest serving Republican in the U.S. Senate, current president pro tempore and the prince of pork.

Isn't it wonderful we're in safe hands with a self-described "conservative" administration and Congress, the crowd who refer to themselves as proponents of personal responsibility and rugged individualism?

They -- who know best on everything -- don't want us worrying our little minds with big ole complicated things like television remote controls or the misappropriation of taxpayer money to build bridges to nowhere.

Surely, in saving us from ourselves, they will move quickly to ban indecencies like Rev. Robertson's call for the assassination of a foreign leader, or the Bush administration's lies that led the country into war.

Hey, isn't banning stuff fun? Will we all get to ban something? They would ban Janet Jackson's breast: I would ban hypocrisy.

Decency is in the eye of the beholder, after all.

Can we please change the channel now?

High school student cashes in on bio-diesel

HAINES CITY - Joe Gravelle is cashing in on the rising cost of fuel in America. As a local user of bio-diesel, an alternative fuel source, he is making his own bio-diesel and saving money on commercial diesel fuel. "It even burns cleaner than regular diesel fuel because it is vegetable based," said the junior at Haines City High School.

Gravelle learned about bio-diesel online and started using it for an engineering project in Joel Decker's Engineering I class at Haines City High School. Gravelle's original idea was to have a simple project that he could get a good grade on. But he saw the opportunity to save money and now uses the bio-diesel for his own benefit.

The cost of bio-fuel is about $1 a gallon, including the diesel fuel that is in it. Owners of diesel vehicles can switch from regular diesel fuel to bio-diesel, no breaking in necessary.


Beating high fuel costs ....

• Junior cashes in on ability to develop cheaper bio-diesel

Yoga edge improves athletes' performance

LAKELAND - It's no surprise athletes find yoga a useful complement to their sport-specific training, says Frankie Hart, a longtime dancer who opened the Satya Life yoga studio in Lakeland last year. She has worked with high school and college soccer and basketball players, golfers and cheerleaders.

Hart, who has taught yoga for 15 years, says the regimen works a wider range of muscles than other forms of exercise. She says athletes tend to overdevelop certain muscles and neglect others.

Yoga benefits them by strengthening "counter muscles" -- for example, a cyclist might have strong quadriceps muscles but weak hamstrings. Yoga's emphasis on controlled stretching also loosens muscles, yielding better balance and agility.

In a more general sense, Hart says yoga creates "body intelligence."

"Yoga helps us learn how to work more efficiently," Hart says. "If you're an athlete, you're trying to gain better performance with less energy expenditure."

While athletes tend to notice the physical effects of yoga, Hart says the mental part of the discipline can be equally beneficial. She says the refined awareness yoga can produce mirrors the deep concentration athletes achieve during peak performance, a state often described as being "in the zone."

"Yoga can feed that for a person because yoga brings the mind and body together," Hart says. "There are no other distractions. You're completely in the moment, and athletes understand how important that is."



Student interviews ....

• Athletes strike a pose to improve performance

Photos of my way-cool Second City cousin, Christopher Starhawk -- instructor of Hatha Yoga and Raw/Living Foods nutrition ....

• Goddess and the Warrior yoga

Polish newspapers protest press censorship in Belarus

Two leading Polish newspapers have published censored front pages to protest against curbs on freedom of speech in neighbouring Belarus.

The papers have teamed up with Amnesty International for the campaign being carried out in Poland and Brussels. Organisers say they want to raise awareness in the European Union of the civil rights abuses committed by Alexander Lukashenko's regime.

Black marker pen has been run through the headlines, photographs and text. Underneath a caption says this is "how freedom of speech looks in Belarus".

Postcards

Leading daily Gazeta Wyborcza writes that it is the first time since communism fell in 1989 it has published a censored front page. It invites its readers to send an enclosed Amnesty International postcard to Belarussian President Lukashenko expressing concern about his lack of tolerance for dissent.

The human rights group has also put up 30,000 posters in major Polish cities and Brussels. The posters are portraits of five Belarussian politicians and journalists. Each face has grey masking tape placed over the mouth.

Opposition leaders in the former Soviet republic say Mr Lukashenko has become increasingly authoritarian, suppressing freedom of speech and jailing dissenters.


Story and related links ....

• Belarus-Poland dispute escalates

Updates, 14 December 2005 ....

The parliament of Belarus has passed a law intended to stop mass protests - ahead of 2006 presidential elections.

The law will make it a criminal offence to "discredit" the Belarusian state both within Belarus and abroad - with a three year jail term for offenders.

• Belarus tightens up protest laws
• Belarus coverage by MosNews.com

Bush clarifies his exit strategy

The president addresses US troops in Osan, Korea

. . . 55 years after US forces entered the Korean conflict:

"As South Korea has grown more free and prosperous, it's built an increasingly capable military that is now ready to assume a larger role in defending its people. By assuming some responsibilities that have traditionally been shouldered by American forces, South Korea will strengthen the deterrent on the Korean Peninsula and free up some of our combat forces to help us win the war on terror."

. . . and two years after US forces invaded Iraq:

"Our strategy can be summed up this way: As Iraqis stand up, we will stand down, and when our commanders on the ground tell me that Iraqi forces can defend their freedom, our troops will come home with the honor they have earned."


So, that's his exit strategy. Two years down, fifty-three to go.

Any questions?

Why Bob Graham voted against the Iraq invasion

The president has undermined trust. No longer will the members of Congress be entitled to accept his veracity. Caveat emptor has become the word. Every member of Congress is on his or her own to determine the truth.

As chairman of the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence during the tragedy of Sept. 11, 2001, and the run-up to the Iraq war, I probably had as much access to the intelligence on which the war was predicated as any other member of Congress.

I, too, presumed the president was being truthful -- until a series of events undercut that confidence.

[ .... ]

From my advantaged position, I had earlier concluded that a war with Iraq would be a distraction from the successful and expeditious completion of our aims in Afghanistan. I had come to question whether the White House was telling the truth -- or even had an interest in knowing the truth.

On Oct. 11, I voted No on the resolution to give the president authority to go to war against Iraq. I was able to apply caveat emptor. Most of my colleagues could not.

Read Senator Graham's reasons ....

• What I knew before the invasion

Florida child welfare officials: 'Get rid of kids...'

MIAMI HERALD: Faced with a looming $8 million shortfall of money to care for former foster children, Florida child welfare administrators proposed this solution: They asked Miami-Dade's private foster care agency to ''get rid of kids'' who are eligible for financial aid.

The head of Miami-Dade's foster care agency, Henry ''Hank'' Adorno, refused.

``You want Our Kids to be the scapegoat; you want us to be the ones to tell these kids you have no money. . . . How about a little honesty?''

[....]

The dustup between DCF and its hand-picked private foster care agency could have consequences for Gov. Jeb Bush and his DCF secretary, Lucy D. Hadi.

Privatization of foster care and adoption programs was at the heart of Bush's plan to reform the child welfare system.

The transition to private management has been bumpy from the start.

But never has a private foster care agency filed suit against the state, and rarely before have relations between DCF and its own community-based care provider become so acrimonious.

Members of the alliance, created to help Miami-Dade transition into private foster care management, did not want Hood to take his lumps alone.

As dozens of children's advocates listened on a speakerphone, Circuit Judge Cindy Lederman, chief of juvenile court and the alliance's head, called Hadi's office to ask the agency head for some more money.

Hadi's secretary said she wasn't available and said the discussion would have to be postponed.


Miami Herald articles (registration is free) ....

• Agency refuses to cut back
• Doctors sue state over care for poor kids

Biodiesel Q & A

A Tampa company has lofty plans to continue importing the alternative fuel from Ecuador to sell for use in diesel engines.


What is biodiesel?

Biodiesel is a renewable diesel replacement fuel that is manufactured from plant oils and animal fats, such as soybean oil and recycled cooking oils. To manufacture biodiesel, these fats and oils are chemically removed to produce biodiesel and a glycerin coproduct. Biodiesel can be used pure (B100 or "neat" biodiesel) or in any concentration with petroleum-based diesel fuel to create a biodiesel blend.

More ....

• Biodiesel Q&A
• Cruising Polk roads in vegetarian cars
• Huge biodiesel shipment arrives
• Biodiesel for sale in the US
• Canada is ready for biodiesel
• US Department of Energy - Alternative Fuels Data Center

New Hampshire boy gets his kicks in Lakeland

Pope, left, hopes to lead Eagles back to state as new season starts.

LAKELAND -- Kevin Pope enjoyed growing up in Durham, New Hampshire -- a small town of about 12,000, about 60 miles north of Boston. He thrived athletically, playing on two state championship teams in boys soccer for Oyster River High School.

Soccer isn't exactly a year-round sport in the Northeast. So his family moved to Florida and settled in Lakeland, and Pope ended up at George Jenkins. It couldn't have worked out any better. Pope emerged as one of the top players in the county on a state runner-up.

"Up there, there were three or four real good teams," Pope said. "Down here, you play against a lot of good teams."

George Jenkins coach Jim Cross [a friend of mine] said he heard that he was getting a very good player last year, but Pope turned out to be even better than advertised. He led the county with 42 goals and was second in overall points.

Pope joined a talented team that was led by the 2003-04 county player of the year, midfielder Jake Howard, who is now at the University of Central Florida. It didn't take long for Pope to fit in with his new teammates.

Pope is more than just a soccer player. Like his brother, he'll be playing college soccer although it won't be on an athletic scholarship. But that doesn't have anything to do with his talent. It's just that Ivy League schools don't give athletic scholarships, and Pope learned last week that he was accepted at Yale.

• Ledger article .... Move Benefited Jenkins' Kevin Pope

How many more have to die for it to be 'the right time'?

From David Sirota at The Huffington Post:

"...Yet, in response to Murtha's announcement, some Democrats seemed to leap at the chance to embarrass themselves, and publicly flaunt just how nauseatingly spineless they are. And there is no better example of this than Rep. Rahm Emanuel (D-IL) in today's Washington Post. Here is the excerpt -- try not to projectile vomit all over your computer screen when you read it:

"Murtha's Democratic colleagues reacted warily to his remarks, while Republicans pounced. Rep. Rahm Emanuel (Ill.), head of the House Democrats' campaign effort, said, 'Jack Murtha went out and spoke for Jack Murtha.' As for Iraq policy, Emanuel added: 'At the right time, we will have a position.'"

"Remember, this is the same Rahm Emanuel who likes to talk about how tough he is, and who likes to have his friends go out and talk about the hardness of his testicles. His comment is not tough -- it is classic try-to-have-it-both-ways prevarication that reinforces the image of Democrats as governed only by crass political tactics and not conviction. And worse, it is a total insult to America's troops."

[... ]

"Until the party shuts up those in its midst who have no moral compass and who are willing to use their prominence to reinforce a soulless image, Democrats will always face a nagging credibility gap with the American people."


More....

• Rahm, Please Tell Us: How Many More Have to Die for It to Be "The Right Time?"

Congressman 'Opie-Dopie' gets his ears boxed

LAKELAND -- U.S. Rep. Adam Putnam, R-Bartow, was a strong voice in the debate on a controversial budget bill that barely passed in the House on Thursday night.

But he endured withering criticism from Democratic opponents on the floor of the House.

Most dramatic was the dressing-down that Democratic Congressman Marion Berry of Arkansas gave Putnam and others during debate on the bill.

He accused supporters of knowingly hurting the poor and working people.

"I am amazed at you boys over there," Berry said to the Republican side of the House. "I wonder what you are going to be when you grow up."

Then to Putnam in particular: "You can be cute. You can be smart. And you may even pull this off, son. But I tell you one thing, you are young enough that you are going to have to live with it."

Berry is 63, Putnam 31.

MORE....

• Lakeland Ledger article: Putnam scolded by lawmaker in House
• National Public Radio report about the House debate, including comments by Putnam and Berry's criticisms: House lawmakers pass spending cuts
• Booman Tribune coverage: Local political editor drools over our GOP congressman's ties to Hastert
• BlondeSense commentary:
  Your Government at Work: Champions of the Rich, Enemies of the Poor and Middle Class
• FLA Politics image: A 'Howdy Doody looking Nimrod'?

Wonder why....

Too few are recruited for key military jobs

"The military is falling far behind in its effort to recruit and re-enlist soldiers for some of the most vital combat positions in Iraq and Afghanistan, according to a new government report.

"The report, completed by the Government Accountability Office, shows that the Army, National Guard and Marines signed up as few as a third of the Special Forces soldiers, intelligence specialists and translators that they had aimed for in the past year.

"The report found that in all, the military, which is engaged in the most demanding wartime recruitment effort since the 1970s, had failed to staff adequately fully 41 percent of its array of combat and noncombat ranks.

"The active-duty Army missed its target of 80,000 soldiers by 8 percent last year, but fell short of its goal for human intelligence experts by 35 percent.

"Officials with the accountability office, the independent investigative arm of Congress, found that some of the critical shortfalls had been masked by the overfilling of other positions in an effort to reach overall recruiting goals. As a result, the GAO report questioned whether Congress had been given an accurate picture by the Pentagon of the military's ability to maintain the force it needs for Iraq and Afghanistan."

My question: Where are all those Bush voters now? If W's little slam-dunk war on Iraq is such a peachy idea, why aren't the "true" patriots -- the ones who grasp W's "vision thing" -- marching off to earn their own war medals?

Is their idea of supporting the troops nothing more than attacking Democrats, equating gays with terrorists, slapping a yellow flag on the Hummer and diversifying their stock portfolios?

But to actually risk their own skins? Like their chosen leaders, they have other priorities. Their actions proclaim their philosophy: dying is for losers.

• More .... Few Recruited for Key Military Jobs

No reason to trust 'stay the course' policy in Iraq

"There is growing awareness that the American people were lied to by their government and needlessly drawn into war. How does this deception impact what the United States should do regarding Iraq today?

"Three years ago politicians in both parties successfully scared the American people into believing that the national security of the United States would somehow be threatened if we did not invade Iraq. These same politicians now expect us to believe that U.S. national security will be jeopardized unless we continue to prosecute the war.

"Some thoughtful activists and intellectuals who opposed the invasion of Iraq have since concluded that because the elected Iraqi government is reasonably representative of the majority of the Iraqi people, because much of the insurgent movement is dominated by fascistic Islamists and Baathists, and because the Iraqi government is too weak to defend itself, U.S. armed forces should remain. These activists argue that even though the premise of the invasion was a lie and the occupation was tragically mishandled, the consequences of a precipitous U.S. military withdrawal would result in a far worse situation than exists now.

"Such a case might be worth consideration if the Bush administration and congressional leaders had demonstrated that they had the integrity, knowledge, foresight, and competence to successfully lead a counterinsurgency war in a complex, fractured society on the far side of the planet. To support the continued prosecution of the Iraq War, however, would require trusting the same politicians who hoodwinked the country into that war in the first place. A growing number of Americans, therefore, have come to recognize that any administration dishonest enough to make the ludicrous pre-war claims of an Iraqi military threat and any Congress that—through whatever combination of dishonesty or stupidity—chose to reinforce these false assertions simply cannot be trusted to successfully control the insurgency, extricate the United States from further military involvement, and successfully facilitate Iraq's development as a peaceful, secure, democratic country." ....

• Stephen Zunes essay .... Foreign Policy in Focus.

Zunes is Middle East editor for Foreign Policy In Focus, a professor of Politics at the University of San Francisco, and the author of Tinderbox: U.S. Middle East Policy and the Roots of Terrorism (Common Courage Press, 2003).

Poll: Florida vote for Jeb! as president unlikely

TALLAHASSEE -- "A growing majority of Florida voters disapprove of the job President Bush is doing and say it's unlikely they would vote for his brother, Gov. Jeb Bush, if he seeks the presidency in 2008, a poll released Wednesday shows.

"Fifty-eight percent of Florida voters polled said they probably or definitely would not vote for the governor in a presidential race while only 33 percent said they probably or definitely would vote for him.

"Floridians also favor two New Yorkers for the presidential nominations in their respective parties, Democratic Sen. Hillary Clinton and Republican Rudy Giuliani, New York City's former mayor. The poll question listed only likely candidates and did not include Jeb Bush." ....

More ....

• Read the AP story at Lakeland Ledger.
• Bush brothers photo from Florida Politics.

Day in pictures

Japanese farmers in Miyazaki prefecture tend to a field of vegetables, surrounded by flowers.
BBC News

Garden progress

Republicans losing ground in latest Florida polls

Poll Gives Davis Lead Over Crist, Gallagher

TALLAHASSEE - -- "For the first time, a poll shows Democrat Jim Davis with a tie or lead against the two top Republican candidates for governor, Charlie Crist and Tom Gallagher -- a possible effect of declining popularity of the Bush presidency.

"The poll, by Quinnipiac University Polling Institute, shows Davis leading by 40 percent to 39 percent when matched against Crist and 41 percent to 38 percent against Gallagher.

"Given the 3.4 percentage-point error margin, both outcomes are statistical ties, but they compare with double-digit leads for Crist and Gallagher when matched against Davis in previous polls."

TBO story here.


Harris loses campaign manager

TALLAHASSEE -- "In a double blow to her already-struggling U.S. Senate campaign, Republican Katherine Harris lost her campaign manager Tuesday as a new poll showed her badly trailing incumbent Democrat Bill Nelson.

"Jim Dornan, a GOP consultant with a long background in national politics, stepped down from his position as Harris' campaign manager, citing a "difference of opinions." He will remain on the Longboat Key Republican's team as a 'senior adviser'."

• Ledger story here.

Deck flowers

Thank yesterday's Nader-ites for tomorrow's Supremes

Where are the Nader-ites today? Celebrating Bush's Supreme Court nominees? They must be. Proudly.

The "no difference between Bush and Gore" crowd has been strangely quiet for the past five years, yet who can forget their role in the 2000 presidential election?

I haven't forgotten, and neither has another guy I like to read, Andy Ostroy:

The Rehnquist-for-Roberts swap had little consequence. The O'Connor-for-Alito trade, however, has the potential to dramatically and dangerously shift the high court to the far right. The Democrats must come out in full body-armor on this one and fight to the death if we ever intend to preserve personal freedoms; the right to privacy; separation of church and state; and other constitutional bedrocks.

This nightmarish scare is the work of those misguided Nader-ites who, back in 2000, said there was "no difference" between Gore and Bush; who said they felt disappointed and betrayed by the Democratic Party; who said they needed to "send a message" of this frustration through their "protest vote" for Nader. They sent a message alright, and that message was..."Welcome to the White House, Mr. Bush." Want to talk betrayal? How about how the Nader-ites now feel having lived through five years of the Bush betrayal on humanity? Their unfortunate protest vote just might result in the conservative Taliban of this country setting back judicial progress 30+ years.

More ....

• The Ostroy Report (Tab down to "We Can Thank the Nader-ites for 'Scalito' Alito")
• The Nader Difference, 2000

Fairness for Florida families

FLORIDA -- On Tuesday, November 8, thousands of right-wing extremists will be at the ballot box collecting petition signatures to add discriminatory language to the Florida Constitution that would permanently ban same-sex marriage.

If passed, this mean-spirited amendment would not only permanently block marriage, but it would also deny access to civil unions and threatens domestic partner benefits currently granted to thousands of Floridians. To do this they have committed to collecting 100,000 signatures on Election Day, November 8th.

Opponents of gays and lesbians are working hard every day to pass this discriminatory law. We must do the same.

Please go to this link and sign the Petition Pledge:

I pledge to vote against any constitutional amendment that permanently blocks marriages and civil unions for same-sex couples and threatens domestic partnership protections currently enjoyed by thousands of gay and straight partners in Florida.

Poll shows Iraqis back attacks on UK, US forces

Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:49 PM ET12
LONDON (Reuters) --

Forty-five percent of Iraqis believe attacks on U.S. and British troops are justified, according to a secret poll said to have been commissioned by British defense leaders and cited by The Sunday Telegraph.

Less than 1 percent of those polled believed that the forces were responsible for any improvement in security, according to poll figures.

Eighty-two percent of those polled said they were "strongly opposed" to the presence of the troops.

The paper said the poll, conducted in August by an Iraqi university research team, was commissioned by the Ministry of Defense.

My letter to Republicans on the Senate Judiciary Committee

Lakeland, Florida
November 1, 2005


Dear Senator,

I urge you to oppose all attempts to pass the Marriage Protection Amendment. The proposed amendment does nothing to protect marriage as it exists -- but much to destroy whatever hope gays and lesbians have to experience the same "life, liberty and pursuit of happiness" taken for granted by other Americans.

Last week religious leaders and social conservatives within the Republican Party celebrated their power to undermine a Supreme Court nomination. This week they are attempting to block a minority of citizens from attaining the basic human rights guaranteed by the U. S. Constitution.

Because they supported Republican candidates for Congress, the groups opposed to equality demand an entitlement to their choice of federal judges and to a Constitutional amendment that furthers their political views. They build such demands on reminders of the "twenty years or more" they have spent "fighting in the trenches" for their agenda.

Unlike their twenty-year wait, my wait to enjoy the rights promised by the US Constitution has been not for twenty or thirty or forty years -- but for my entire life. Along the way I have fulfilled a military obligation. I have been a law-abiding citizen. I have served my community and worked to build a better future for the country I love.

My ancestors fought in the Revolutionary War, and every war since, to protect our homeland. Every time they put their lives on the line, they did so alongside gays and lesbians -- patriots who also bled and died to ensure that "all men are created equal" applied to the minority as well as the majority.

So, I am not amused by the voices of prejudice and oppression who demand that my rights shall be ignored forever. I do not intend to disappear from the face of the earth because they are offended by my existence or my expectation of legal equality.

The opponents of same-sex marriage, or its legal equivalent, have never explained how the granting of equal rights -- whatever those rights are called -- deprives anyone else of his or her own rights and personal convictions.

Where are the proposals to deny straights their choice of marriage partners? Where are the proposals to force anyone, gay or straight, into a same-sex marriage? They do not exist.

Perhaps I've missed a big story out of Massachusetts, but indications are that legalized gay marriage has not caused the cancellation of traditional wedding ceremonies, the closing of churches, the breakup of heterosexual families or the abuse of a single child. In fact, Massachusetts has the lowest divorce rate in the nation -- half the rate of states in which legal rights for gays are most vehemently opposed. (Divorce Rates by State)

Senator, I appeal to you, before you support anti-gay legislation, to try putting yourself into the shoes of your fellow citizens:

What if you knew that you could never, for your entire lifetime, legally marry the person you love? You could never experience any relationship that resembles marriage? You could never expect the family security that even convicted criminals take for granted? You could never adopt children, even the biological children of your life partner?

What would you do? Would you live your entire life in shame or denial? Would you accept the morality espoused by Jerry Falwell, James Dobson and Pat Robertson over your own humanity, spirituality and life experience? Or would you demand your birthright as a human being and an American citizen?

The proponents of anti-gay legislation base their arguments upon religious doctrine and personal conviction, yet they would never, under any circumstance, accept an amended Constitution reflecting my religious beliefs and my personal convictions. How, under our Constitution, did their beliefs and convictions become superior to mine?

Senator, I hope that you agree with me that we are never safe in basing laws for everyone upon the religious views of some, whether those beliefs belong to me or to the people whose goal is to destroy my rights. All of us are better served -- even in the practice of religion itself -- by laws derived not from religion or personal prejudice, but from an acceptance of equality and a respect for our differences. That is what our country's greatest document demands, both in spirit and in letter.

I beg you to resist the voices of prejudice, demagoguery and political opportunism. Please do not allow the destruction of the American dream. Not only would a Constitutional amendment damage the lives of American citizens, it would destroy the very foundation upon which our country was established.

Avon Park bombing likely to go up

The November 1, 2005
By Tom Palmer, The Lakeland Ledger

The Navy's plan may pose a threat to several species, including the protected Florida scrub-jay. Increased bombing is scheduled to begin next spring.

The fighter-bombers would drop more than 13,000 practice bombs, up from nearly 8,400, and more than 1,500 high explosive bombs. Military aircraft would fire as many as 27 Hellfire missles at targets on the ground and helicopter flights would increase from nearly 1,100 to more than 1,400. The Navy considered six plans, and while the chosen one is not the least disruptive of the alternatives, it is close to it.

In addition to scrub-jays, the bombing is likely to affect Eastern indigo snakes adversely, as well as pigeonwing and jointweed, two rare plant species found primarily on Central Florida's sand ridges.

More on this story and related articles:

• Navy bombing south of Lakeland
• Florida scrub-jay

Wonder Girl greets Halloween guests

Appalachian Bloom, or "Apples", loves to dress up, sit back and greet her many guests.
She resides with Kuz'n Kirk on the old plantation.

President's remarks at groundbreaking ceremony for Arlington National Cemetery High Capacity Mega-Crypt

Remarks by the President
October 26, 2005

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you, thank you. You may be seated.

As we all know, yesterday came word of an important milestone in our nation's history: 2,000 Americans killed in the war in Iraq. 2,000 heroes � or "H2K," as I like to call it.

Now normally I ignore the price we're paying in order to spread delicious, creamery FREEDOM� all over the biscuit of the Middle East. And I ignore it with good reason � corpses are depressing, and seeing the consequences of war sure takes the wham-bang out of the glistening boner that is acting tough. I make an exception today for one reason: can't avoid it. (Winks.)

You know my poppy often blabbed about "1,000 Points of Light." And since he was just a one-term loser, I kinda figured that 2,000 should be my signature number. 2,000 days of paid vacation. 2,000 environmental regulations gutted. 2,000 flag-draped caskets whisked home under cover of darkness. And so on and so forth.

But now that I've reached my goals so far ahead of schedule, I'm thinking even bigger. After all, with over three years left in my term, what's to stop me from making it to H3K? Or even H4K?!
(Applause.)

I'm confident it's doable. And fortunately for me, there is a particular breed of super-vocal mega-patriot whose enthusiasm for American death is, conveniently, directly proportionate to the number of soldier's lives I squelch out.

For these model Republicans, it's like Iraq is a big old slot machine, our soldiers are shiny silver dollars, and the only way to ever get that sucker to maybe-possibly spit out a few nickels is to keep feeding the beast. Forever. No matter what. If for no other reason than to honor the memory of the silver dollars already squandered � and send them plenty of company so that they won't get lone up in silver dollar heaven. Yes, under my watch, America has become a leathery, chain-smoking granny at Luxor, feverishly pumping the one-armed bandit that is Iraq.

(Applause.)

Of course, an inescapable consequence of my inspired leadership is that today, here in the shadow of the Pentagon, Arlington National Cemetery is nearly bursting at the seams. And that is why, in a striking example of my gift for planning for the future, I am pleased to be here today for the groundbreaking of the "George W. Bush FREEDOM� Crypt."

(Applause.)

This state of the art, 32-story hero-interment facility boasts a 25,000 coffin capacity on a mere one acre footprint. The first of many such structures that will one day, God willing, constitute a mighty necropolis in the sky, and I will be honored to have it bear my name.

(Shovels chunk of sod.)

(Applause.)

Furthermore, I am pleased to announce that not a single tax dollar will be spent on this here monument. No sir, because the whole shi-bang is being underwritten by the Petro-Industrial-Military-Evangelical-Princeton-Country Club-Complex at no cost to the public � save for a $35/ticket admission. Plus tax. And parking fees.

(Applause.)

And just wait until you see the gift shop! We guarantee that you'll walk in a fat, smug, narcissistic right-wing ideological automaton yearning to shed the guilt incurred supporting a war launched purely to assuage your insecurities, and you'll leave the exactly same, except under the comfortable delusion that you've paid your debt with shallow grief.

(Knowing Laughter, Applause.)

And with that, I'd better get back to work so we can start filling this sucker up just as soon as it's finished!

Thank you, and God Bless America!

(Applause.)

Thanks to The White House Newsroom